Beautiful Isn’t Fair

No one doing something beautiful ever got there by complaining about things not being fair. They were too busy working towards something beautiful. Too busy painting the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, too busy sculpting David. Too busy taking the first steps on the moon, too busy writing ‘Stairway to Heaven.’

And right now, while you are complaining about things not being fair, someone else is too busy to complain because they are working towards something beautiful.

Life rewards those who rise above the meddling conversation of comparison, to whom the term ‘level playing field’ is a talking point for politicians debating in favor of the mediocrity of their constituents.

We weave ‘fairness’ into our human constructs, as some kind of desired middle ground to give everyone a chance because we think we can control such circumstances. But life itself unfolds against those constructs, since nothing about life is fair. Good people are taken too soon, often by bad people who are left here too long. Nature has no sense of ‘fair,’ and in fact nothing in nature has so refined a moral compass as to determine what fair is or what it is not. Are natural disasters fair when they take out innocent children? Of course not, but nature keeps on happening, and contrary to the more hubric (WHAT DOES HUBRIC MEAN?) among us, there is nothing we can do about it.

And that is a liberating thing, because you don’t have to carry the burden of depending on what is fair. Unload the constant weight of comparison to others, the never-ending search for a level playing field and take your talent and develop it and rise above the level playing field, above the ordinary fighting over what is fair, to something beautiful.

Because when life is not fair, when it is truly extraordinary, it is beautiful.

Dear Me

My last blog was a letter to You. Here’s one to Me, except this one is to the Me just starting out on (what I thought was) the path to my dreams.

Dear Me,

Don’t worry about it.

The doors of opportunity not budging open, no matter how hard you push, not even an inch? It’s ok. Some doors are meant to open, some are meant to stay closed.

Trying to get in with the people who might be able to help you somehow? Doesn’t work. People will say it does, but those are the same people who are trying to do it themselves. You don’t want to be that guy.

Worried about being alone, as you spend your solitary nights watching the rain make its way down the glass that separates you from the outside world? Embrace it. Those are the times to work on your craft and get to know what you’re really about and who you really are. If you do, you will become comfortable with your own silence, which is one of the great secrets to having a deep, and meaningful life.

Not sure if you’re even doing the right thing, because you’re struggling while everyone else seems to have their shit together? They don’t. They have the same problems as you, they just call them by different names and try their best to hide them from everybody else. Sooner or later those problems come to the surface for everyone. It’s how you’ll handle your own that will make the difference.

You could be better about expressing yourself truthfully and not just saying what you think people want to hear. You’re not a liar by nature but there’s probably a three year period in your twenties when you try to play the game because you think everybody else is getting ahead by that kind of hustling. Don’t do it. It’s silly and authentic people see through it.

But you do end up doing a pretty good job of looking out for the other guy. Keep it up.

And take yourself a little less seriously. Your time here is precious, so don’t waste it on small dramas. Laugh more and go to more movies, even if it’s by yourself.

Focus more on doing beautiful things, less on asking people to look at or listen to what you’ve done. They will come around in time. Maybe not within your supposed timeline, but in time.

There really isn’t one path to your dreams, and your dreams aren’t even the right thing for you. That sounds crazy, I know, but what you think you want and what you need are two totally different things. When things aren’t working out, understand that those times are life’s way of wanting to take you by the hand and lead you down your own path of meaning and significance and beauty. Take her hand and let her lead.

Most of these lessons you’re going to learn anyway, but I thought I’d try to save you some sweet, sweet, irretrievable time. Because this moment now is all you really have.

The next moments? They will fall into place.

So hang in there.

And don’t worry about it.